Did you negotiate your salary?

“We’ve all heard it before: By not negotiating, women sacrifice thousands of dollars by the end of their professional lives. Recent research has revealed, however, that the number is closer to half a million.”[1] This quote comes from an article on the Glass Hammer which cites that 52% of male MBA graduates surveyed negotiate their salaries, compared with 12% of female MBA graduates. And when the researcher had people evaluate those negotiations (on video) the women were perceived as demanding, while the men were not.

Should you negotiate? The article says “yes” and hits on many of the whys. I’d add a few tips:

  • Do your research. In addition to the resources cited in the article, visit Glass Door to see what salaries other people have reported at the same company. Talk to people at other organizations in the same field.
  • “The first person to speak loses,” conventional wisdom says. Not necessarily: "In our studies, we found that the final outcome of a negotiation is affected by whether the buyer or the seller makes the first offer. Specifically, when a seller makes the first offer, the final settlement price tends to be higher than when the buyer makes the first offer.”[2] Speaking first allows you to set the floor, and dictate what the minimum is you are willing to accept.
  • Be comfortable with your “floor.” A few jobs ago I gave the hiring manager a salary range. I reached a bit for the ceiling figuring: “you don’t know if you don’t ask.” I was also a bit modest on the floor because I didn’t want to appear greedy. When the offer came back, it was my floor. I stuttered, but I couldn’t negotiate up from there, I’d already told them I’d accept that number.
  • Remember the intangibles. This article only addresses financial compensation. While I agree that it’s the primary form of compensation (and the wage gap between men and women is real), it’s not the only way you can be paid for doing your job. Same salary with more time off = higher hourly wage. Or would your employer allow you to work from home 2 days per week, so you can save on commuting time and dry cleaning costs? Are bonuses or commissions available?

What do you lose if you don’t negotiate?

  • As this article points out, you leave money on the table.
  • Probably your last chance to influence your salary. Aside from a serious promotion and a major increase in responsibility, the best you can expect at most jobs is annual cost-of-living adjustments. Your salary - for however long you work at a job - is based primarily on your negotiations when you first enter that job.
  • You leave respect on the table. Not many employers will say, “Actually, we should be paying you more.” If you don’t know what your skills are worth financially, don’t expect them to tell you. 

How do you avoid looking demanding? 

  • You aren't demanding anything; this is a conversation - built on trust and mutual respect (which you would have hopefully built through the interview process).
  • Plan your answers to salary questions. Just like you prepare answers to other interview questions, prepare for these. Knowing exactly what you will say will help you communicate with confidence. Have facts and figures to back your position up: “The average salary for someone performing this type of work with my skills and experience is $X.” Role-play if you have to.
  • Focus on the value of your work, and what you will bring to the position.  Can you cite sales goals reached at your last job? Or money you saved your previous employer? Even if you can't quantify the financial value of your work, by focusing on the value of the work, you point out what they are asking for – it’s not just a random number you made up.
  • Treat it as a business transaction - the job isn't your identity and the salary isn't your identity.

 

[1] Negotiation November – Why Women Need to Start Negotiating Early on the Glass Hammer. A friend of mine from grad school was quoted in the article (Kate Farrar), which is how I found it.

[2]  Adam D. Galinsky of Northwestern's Kellogg School of Management and Roderick I. Swaab of INSEAD

Serving God means you'll have to do something you hate

Last week I posted a virtual tour of the Sistine Chapel. I think part of the reason it impacted me so much is because I read The Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follett over Christmas.

The central activity in this [long] book is the building of the Kingsbridge Cathedral. It gave me some appreciation for just how hard it would have been to build the Sistine Chapel or a similar structure.

One of the main characters – Prior Phillip – is a monk who leads Kingsbridge Priory. While he definitely feels called to the life of a contemplative monk, he realizes it’s not for everyone, not even for every monk.

One exchange in particular stood out to me. Phillip is talking with a young monk named Jonathan who is trying to figure out just what kind of monk he should be (one who lives a contemplative life, one who tends the priory’s sheep, or one who sells and trades goods).

The conversation sounds similar to ones I’ve had with friends, or gals I’m mentoring. When we feel stuck about which job we should do next or wondering what our “calling” is. We'll look around and find the "hardest" thing and assume that's what God is calling us to.

The dialogue starts out with Jonathan speaking about what God might be calling him to[i]:

        “It’s hard to imagine He has a role cut out for me.” Says Jonathan.
        “I can’t think He would have gone to so much trouble with you if He didn’t,” Prior Phillip said with a smile. “However it might not be a grand or prominent role in worldly terms. He might want you to become one of the quiet monks, a humble man who devotes his life to prayer and contemplation.”
        Jonathan’s face fell. “I suppose he might.”
        Phillip laughed. “But I don’t think so. God wouldn’t make a knife out of wood, or a lady’s chemise of shoe leather. You aren’t the right material for a life of quietude, and God knows it. My guess is that he wants you to fight for him, not sing to him.”

Do you ever feel the same as Jonathan - afraid God is going to make you do something you can’t imagine doing? That in the name of serving God with your life, you’d end up doing something you can’t stand and feel you can’t do well?

I’m not saying that God won’t call you to develop new skills – which could be painful. Or that you won’t ever serve Him in a place that feels uncomfortable to you because of the good you can do there or the character He can develop in you.

But I want to encourage you to look at the hints of God’s calling that He gave you in your personality and preferences – what do you enjoy doing? What are you good at? Could it be that God is calling you somewhere you can use those gifts?

Also, look to God's word -

  • In Jeremiah 29:11, it reads: "I know the plans I have for you" declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you a hope and a future."  (NIV)
  • James 1:17 says "Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows." (NIV)
  • Matthew 7:9 - "Which of you, if your son asks for bread, will give him a stone?" (NIV)

PS: I found Pillars of the Earth to be a very moving story, but I’ll give some disclaimers before you pick it up. The book includes some graphic and violent details of living in war-torn England in the 1100s – so read it knowing your own sensibilities.

[i] Follett, Ken. The Pillars of the Earth. Penguin, 1990. Page 836.